I hope everyone is doing ok and keeping safe at home.
Right now I have a lot of thoughts and a lot of spare time to spend with those thoughts, even though I am working from home. Our daily routine distractions have been taken away from us, so all those thoughts you can push back to the back of your mind with day to day life, can slowly make their way to the front.
“Is this the life you want?”
” Are you really a eat, work, sleep and repeat kind of person?”
“Have you let your dreams die?”
This is a time of reflection, a chance to look at our lives and see what is making us truly happy and what is just a distraction. The problem with that is, what if you don’t trust your own thoughts? What if you can’t separate what is your own thought and what is an intrusive thought.
A good 75% of most days I will spend with music blasting in my ears, doing that right now. It is not only just a tool to distract me from my thoughts but focus me at the same time, if that makes sense. It can help me push the intrusive thoughts and bullshit out of the spotlight, so I am not always fighting through a fog of thoughts to get to the thing that I need to be concentrating on.
Sometimes though, I can’t always tell the difference between what is an intrusive thought, and what is my own and that can leave you with a feeling of not knowing who you are. It has felt like at times like I am my way through life and becoming a reflection to suit the people around me because I didn’t trust my thoughts, I had no identity. So when I am left alone with that reflection, it has caused me mental anguish then it did help me.
Thoughts are more than something that pops up in a person’s mind, they can determine and they can blur that line of reality, thoughts can rise a dream or bring it crashing down and thoughts can bring people together and can cause utter loneliness.
Being alone with our thoughts is not always easy and right now more of us have more free time with them, that’s a scary thought! So, write about them, draw about them, talk about them, vlog about them. You got this shit!
Take care all,