For the first time in a long time, I am starting to feel like a functioning adult. It feels weird as fuck±! I remember telling my therapist a few weeks ago that I wanted to just feel normal, which she then replied, what is normal? A lot has happened to turn my life upside down and inside out, which has made me feel out of sync with the world around me. I didn’t have any purpose to get out of bed, to have any motivation to do anything because it felt like everything was shit, so what was the point. So by me having a new job that I can safely do, helps give me a reason to get up in the morning. So that is what I meant by normal, I feel like I need to find my place in the world again.
Don\t get me wrong, I am sure the shine will start to fade soon and I will be like every other adult again, cursing early mornings and hating morning people who talk to you before your caffeine hits your system. At least I am brushing my hair now regularly and not living in the same set of pyjamas for days on end. Hmmm, actually may be returning to the world of adulthood was a mistake.
Tip of the day –
Following the bread crumbs.
We all can get a little lost in the world at times, we can all feel like we just cant human right. I am still lost but I am following the bread crumbs that I left myself to find my way again. We don’t need to try and be like anyone else to find ourselves or even look for who we used to be. We need to look for who we are now and build on that for who we are going to be. If we follow someone else’s breadcrumbs we could end up finding who they want us to be instead of who we want us to be.
If we wait for perfection to lead the way to who we want to be, then we may end up lost for a long time.
What are the bread crumbs?
Well, that depends on the person, but to me, breadcrumbs can be the good days where I can laugh and not have anxiety dictate my day. The days where I can see the tiny victories, even if it is has been a bad day. Breadcrumbs are the little things that remind us who we are and show us the good qualities we have.
We don’t have to be doing everything right all the time just because we are adults now, and chasing that perfection may have been the thing that got us lost in the first place. Instead, chase the imperfect days where there are moments of good shit, bad shit and fuck this shit!