Welcome back to crazy little things! I hope everyone is doing ok and if you are not, well that is ok too because you don’t have to be ok all the time as you are only human. I am going to go straight into today’s blog post. I have been working on some artwork called Ghost and it came from an idea, well a negative thought that passes through me all the time. Many of us out there have felt like a ghost, whether it is down to mental illness or a bad life situation. The feeling of feeling invisible is awful and even worse when you feel invisible to yourself. I wrote most of this before I did the drawing. I was in a very dark place when this piece came together and I think in an ironic way this piece will haunt me.
As the girl stood in front of the mirror she asked the reflection that stared back at her, is there anyone there? Can you see me? Will you fucking listen to me? I am not ok… I am not ok… I am a ghost. The dead eyes in the reflection she stared back and smiled at the girl. She didn’t understand how she had not only become a ghost to the world but a ghost to herself. The girls’ reflection didn’t match her identity and she felt the reflection was taunting her by just smiling back at her and not reflecting her true self.
So the girl ran, she ran away from the mirror, from the haunting reflection it was showing her. She went out to the world and asked is there anyone there? can anyone see me? will anyone fucking listen to me? All eyes were finally on her but they didn’t see the girl, they just smiled and told the girl, you are ok.
She wasn’t ok though, she wasn’t ok.
Before the tears could be set free from the girls’ eyes, she smiled and nodded and said I am ok and faded away in the crowd.
How many fires does she need to walk through before she can feel the hot flames that lick at her skin?
How many times will she look at her reflection and not recognize who stares back at her?
How long has she been a ghost?