anxiety · depression · mental health

Me, myself and bipolar

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Hey everyone

IT’S FRIDAY!!!! WELL DONE EVERYONE WE MADE IT, SELF-HIGH FIVES ALL AROUND, oops got carried away with the caps lock there, sorry. I hope everyone is doing ok, what about me I hear you ask, well if it was physically possible to punch this week in the face then I would be doing that right now. Apart from that, I am here, I got a few emotional bruises from this week but bruises fade with time. Riding the storm of a low cycle is going to cause bruises and bumps its inevitable so the recovery of self-care is so important. Self-care does not need always need to be time-consuming, it can be as easy as carrying a notebook with you (or 5 like me). It can be taking time to yourself for 10 minutes when you feel the wind from the storm picking up or reaching out for that umbrella being offered by a friend.
Self-care comes in many different forms and it is not a one size fits all situation, as you’re an individual, try a few things and see what suits you and your needs, not someone else’s.

So it is world bipolar day and obviously, I thought I would do a post about my journey with bipolar. I could give you whole spiel of the facts and figures; you know there are 3 forms of bipolar cyclothymia, bipolar type 1 and bipolar type 2. I could tell about the mania and the depression or the fact that between 30% of people with bipolar end up trying to commit suicide. I could tell you people with bipolar struggle maintaining relationships and even jobs. I could tell you there has been some really fucking successful people who have bipolar, like Carrie Fisher, Russell Brand, Demi Lovato and Frank Bruno to name a few.

My journey so far…
Being diagnosed with Bipolar actually a weight lifted off my shoulders, I remember walking out of the appointment with the psychologist and smiling. I rang my partner and told him and even he was like “why are so happy?” After years of not knowing what the hell was wrong with me and why I did the things I did and thought the things I thought, I had an answer to one of the many questions that kept me up at night.
I went home and did my research and that is when it really hit me, and then my smile faded. Fuck, things are not going to get better, are they? There is no fucking cure, this is my life!
I was wrong though, yes there is no cure but things can get better. Bipolar is one part of me and it was part that I needed to find to put me on the right path. Things aren’t perfect and that’s ok because honestly without bipolar I wouldn’t be here. What I mean is, I actually started this blog when I was in a manic cycle and look nearly a year on I’m still here. So thank you bipolar you helped me find my happy place.

Take care all

Vixxy rose
Xxx

6 thoughts on “Me, myself and bipolar

  1. I had a friend with schizoaffective disorder. The things they said made too much sense to me. I love learning about mental illnesses so I checked psychosis out. And I said fuck, almost all the symptoms fit me. I thought everybody felt like this! It this is actually an illness?? I told my mom and after reading the symptoms she cried. I said “mom. I’m still me. I didn’t change. I just know more about myself”. A year later i got diagnosed with chronic schizophrenia. And that was a relief too, because I finally knew what was “wrong” with me. There’s no cure either and I’ll have to live with it my whole life. The suicide rate is high too.
    I don’t know what bipolar really feels like, but in a way I understand. Personally I think it’s way harder to live with bipolar than schizophrenia. So I applaud your strength. I know I’ve said it many times before, but this is something you can never tell someone enough. 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s amazing how something where most days we wish we never had it was once something that gave us such relief 😊 I personally think it is harder to live with schizophrenia you are one of the bravest and honest people I have ever known ❤️❤️

      Liked by 1 person

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