anxiety · depression · mental health

Burned bridges

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Hey everyone

I hope everyone is doing ok and if you are not remember that it is ok not to be ok. My birthday is coming up in a few weeks and honestly, I fucking hate my birthday, not because I am getting older, because I have a lot of bad memories connected to my birthday and honestly I don’t think I can go to that dark part of my mind to list them. They are already scratching at the door the closer I get to my birthday so for now, I am cementing that door again till I next go to therapy.

On another note, I did something the other day that may not seem like a big deal but for me it was. I was taking care of my nephews for a few hours and they heard my partner call me by my shortened name and they looked at me confused, I explained to them that is what a lot of people call me. They asked if they could call me that and I said yes, which surprised me, as usually my family calls me by long name but I don’t associate with that name anymore. This is a big step for me to recognize who I am and not what other people tell me who I am supposed to me so self-high five for me!

*RANT WARNING EVERYBODY THIS IS YOUR WARNING CALL A RANT IS ON ITS WAY*

Burned bridges

We all have burnt a bridge or two I know I have! But when you are the one responsible for that bridge being burnt then you should be responsible for rebuilding that bridge right?
I always say this that everything has a positive or negative reaction and shouldn’t we all be responsible for the things we put out there in the world. So can someone explain to me why this is so many people out there setting fire to bridges and looking over to the other person at the other end of that burnt bridge to fix it? How do you learn from that?
If you burnt that bridge then you have two choices, fix it or move in another direction and learn from what has happened. if you are the person whose bridge has been burnt then shouldn’t your choices be to let them rebuild and meet halfway and help or move in another direction?

Take care,

Vixxy rose
Xxx

8 thoughts on “Burned bridges

  1. As you indicated darkness associated with that day (won’t name it so no more darkness comes through your barricaded door) is there another day where perhaps you had a major change such as that that you could choose to have as your day? Also treat yourself to a lovely day that is all about you and what you want to do. Lol I use to take a day on my day and now it has extended into a two week holiday every year. It is all about you and no one else. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi! I have had some crazy birthday memories too that I’d rather not recollect and I totally understand the pressure associated with feeling ecstatic on one’s birthday. But what I’ve decided for my next birthday is that I am going to selfishly make it all about me. After all the shit, I deserve it!
    I am going pamper myself and make it up to my younger self for ruining it for undeserving people in the past! X

    I hope you can try doing it as well..❤

    Liked by 1 person

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